Navigating Life After Divorce: Your Guide to a Fresh Start
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Navigating life after divorce presents a labyrinth of emotional transitions ranging from rejection to hope. As roughly half the marriages in the United States culminate in separation, the question of how to start over after divorce becomes increasingly pertinent. This initial journey through adjustment, active recovery, and life reformation can manifest in diverse ways, deeply personalized to each individual's experience. In this grounding section, we orient ourselves with an understanding of the feelings associated with this significant life change, acknowledging the complexities and laying the groundwork for moving forward with optimism.
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Effective strategies for recovering from divorce encompass a spectrum of methods including validating one's emotional journey, engaging in positive self-care, and how to get over a divorce by embracing professional guidance. In exploring how to move on after a divorce, particular focus will be given to the significance of prioritizing children's well-being in one's reshaped narrative, if applicable. Moreover, finding yourself after divorce often involves dismantling barriers such as lingering resentment and anxiety, encouraging a constructive and forward-looking mindset.
A pivotal aspect of this guide is fostering the ethos of empowerment. Empowerment to re-evaluate personal goals, to rebuild a supportive social network, and to maintain cordial relationships with former spouses for communal benefit. This article will examine multifaceted approaches to aid in moving on from divorce, including the prudent engagement with divorce support entities and literature that act as companions on the journey towards healing.
A Parent's Guide: Explaining Divorce to my children available on Amazon
Reflecting on the wisdom imparted by leading resources, such as 'The Co-Parenting Handbook' and 'Home Will Never Be the Same Again: A Guide for Adult Children of Gray Divorce,' readers will glean insights on how to start a new life after divorce, ensuring that while the path after separation is arduous, it's a route marked with the potential for growth, self-discovery, and resilience. Getting over a divorce may be a formidable challenge, but with the right tools and mindset, an individual can emerge with integrity and a renewed sense of connection to the world around them.
Understanding the Emotional Landscape
In the wake of a divorce, individuals often encounter a tumultuous emotional landscape. Life after divorce can usher in an array of intense emotions, from the depths of sadness to waves of anger, a surprising feeling of relief, and a looming fear about the future. Recognizing the breadth of these feelings as natural responses to the end of a significant life chapter enables a person to navigate this terrain with a sense of clarity. However, one must emphasize that suppressing these emotions can be detrimental, hindering the path to recovery. Let us explore the constructive ways one might manage these emotional tides:
- Managing Emotional Responses:
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- Seek dialogue with friends, family, or mental health professionals to verbalize feelings.
- Embrace self-care practices that resonate personally, such as mindfulness, exercise, or creative outlets.
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Participate in support groups designed for individuals recovering from divorce, fostering a community of understanding and shared experiences.
Personal healing journeys are as individual as the stories that precede them, implying there is no definitive timeline for how to move on after a divorce. It is an organic process, which will vary widely from one person to another. This fact underscores the importance of affording oneself grace during this period of change. Meanwhile, children embroiled in the process may confront their own emotional tempests. Reassurances of love and confirmation that it is safe to express their own feelings construct a nurturing environment, crucial for their emotional well-being. Setting this precedent is essential for fostering resilience.
- Adjusting to Post-Divorce Life:
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- Actively rebuild social connections and establish novel routines to underpin a new beginning.
- Prioritize self-compassion, permitting periods of lower functioning, as this is a normal reaction to the seismic shift of divorce.
- Avoid engaging in conflicts with a former spouse, striving instead to navigate co-parenting with grace and flexibility.
- While sadness, anger, exhaustion, and frustration are par for the course, these feelings are signs of a person acknowledging change and beginning to adapt. Extracting positivity from this situation involves engaging in activities one enjoys, pursuing new interests, and constructing a fresh, invigorating routine. How to start over after divorce isn't just a question of altering one's surroundings or social standing; it also encompasses the intimate rebuilding of a person's inner world.
- Lastly, amidst navigating life after divorce, it's important to adopt a positive perspective and a willingness to adapt, especially when children are involved. Embracing the promise of moving forward, while understanding that it may not resemble one's previous reality, carves out space for a redefined sense of normality. The journey through divorce is one of profound transformation and — ultimately — of rediscovery and growth.
Setting Realistic and Empowering Goals
After the finality of divorce, one stands at the crossroads of former life patterns and the uncharted territory of life after divorce. The emotional upheaval often casts a shadow on a future that, albeit uncertain, is ripe with potential for transformation. In stepping forward, setting realistic and empowering goals becomes a beacon that guides one through this transitory phase. One must turn inward, to self-reflect on values and desires profoundly altered by experience, which informs decisions anew.
A Parent's Guide: Explaining Divorce to my children available on Amazon
Commencing this journey, individuals find merit in starting small—a strategy that mitigates overwhelm and structures the progression of healing and growth. One may consider goals such as:
- Crafting a weekly routine that incorporates self-care rituals like exercise or meditation.
- Curating a space at home dedicated to tranquility and personal development.
- Joining a divorce recovery group, to share and listen within a supportive community.
- Expanding the horizon, long-term goals foster an overarching vision to strive towards:
- Financial independence, perhaps through revamping budgeting methods, investing in personal education, or embarking on entrepreneurial ventures.
- Professional development, to renew or pivot career trajectories, facilitated by certifications, further education, or skill-building.
- Recovering from divorce* is amplified by the joy discovered in once-loved activities or the pursuit of new passions. One might reignite enthusiasm and find joy by:
- Revisiting old hobbies or exploring novel interests that enkindle a sense of purpose and excitement.
- Cultivating a robust support system composed of friends and professional aids like therapists or life coaches, offering both solidarity and expertise.
- Establishing a co-parenting plan that emphasizes mutual respect, open communication, and the children's best interests.
- Creating routines and traditions in each household that ensure children feel secure and loved.
Embracing patience is paramount when setting goals post-divorce. Emotional recovery may span years—this is neither a race nor a competition. Instead, it's a conscientious commitment to oneself, to infuse efforts into objectives that resonate, patiently nurturing one's rebirth from the remnants of marital dissolution. The life after divorce is less an end and more a continuum—one that, with thoughtfully set goals, can lead to a future replete with self-actualization and fulfillment.
Rediscovering Your Identity
In the shadows of a dissolved marriage, many individuals confront an identity crisis that challenges their very sense of self. Divorce signifies not just the end of a partnership but the loss of a role that once provided a source of identity. For those who did not initiate or resisted the divorce, this loss often gnaws more deeply at their self-image, compounding their emotional distress. It is at this juncture that one must embark on the path of introspection and self-awareness—essential tools in nurturing the core self that persists beyond the former married identity.
The transition into life after divorce is influenced by one's stance towards the separation—be it acceptance or resistance—and the support available from friends, family, and even professionals like divorce coaches who acclimate individuals to their shifted realities. For many, the identity crisis is entwined with the grieving process, evoking feelings of alienation rather than solidarity. However, by gradually embracing the autonomy and positive aspects of singlehood—from the autonomy in parenting to the freedom to pursue personal interests and release the burden of maintaining unwanted relationships—one can reconstruct a fulfilling post-divorce life.
Rediscovery after divorce demands curiosity and an exploratory attitude towards self, friends, family, and even transitional relationships that, while not permanent, may offer important insights and growth opportunities. In this process of redefinition:
- Encourage self-examination and self-love, recognizing the value you hold independent of the past relationship.
- Create space for new interests and passions that may have been sidelined during marriage, fostering a renewed sense of purpose.
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Set clear boundaries and pursue a life aligned with your authentic self, making way for relationships that reflect and respect your true needs.
While traversing the road of rediscovery, self-awareness becomes an anchor. It sustains one's progress as they learn from past mistakes and construct a new identity on their own terms, devoid of the relationship that once defined them. In the act of reclamation, there are pivotal steps:
- Practice forgiveness, towards yourself and your former spouse, as a means of inward peace and outward progression.
- Live by your values, not compromising on what is fundamentally important to you.
- Be assertive in relationships, ensuring your voice is heard and respected.
- Shed toxic relationships, which may hinder your journey towards healing and self-discovery.
The essence of this evolution lies in accepting and even celebrating the new self—complete with its flaws and burgeoning strengths. It implies getting over a divorce through forgiveness, and the cultivation of new skills, as much as through recognizing the valuable remnants of your past identity. The journey signifies not just survival but the flourishing of life after divorce, where each step, even those misguided, serves as fertile ground for learning and growth.
Building a Supportive Network
In the wake of divorce, individuals must navigate a landscape that's often unfamiliar and emotionally challenging. Bolstering oneself with a diverse supportive network is not just beneficial but essential. This network serves multiple roles—from aiding in the practicalities of legal navigation to providing emotional succor during turbulent times. As one traverses this new life after divorce, a multifaceted approach to building this support system takes precedence.
Professional Support:
- Legal Assistance: Divorce mediation offers a crucial service, enabling a form of dispute resolution that can circumvent the adversarial courtroom experience. A careful screening of legal services is warranted, as knowledgeable guidance could save both time and financial resources.
- Financial Planning: The expertise of a financial planner or a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst is indispensable during divorce proceedings. Such professionals ensure the financial choices made at this juncture safeguard one's future financial stability.
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Mental Health Counsel: Therapists or divorce coaches are paramount in establishing a neutral space for emotional processing. Unlike the well-intentioned opinions of friends and family, these professionals offer unbiased support and strategies for coping.
Personal and Community Support: - Social Circle: Leverage the comfort of friends and family for emotional reinforcement, childcare support, or simply a listening ear. However, maintaining objectivity is key to ensure advice is not contravened by personal biases.
- Support Groups: Whether local or online, support groups for those enduring divorce can share invaluable experiences. These venues offer lessons learned and moral support from others who truly understand the journey of moving on from divorce.
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Spiritual Communities: For those with spiritual inclinations, religious and community groups can be a source of solace and guidance, providing both moral support and a sense of belonging in a time of personal redefinition.
Living through and beyond the initial stages of recovering from divorce demands the establishment of an all-encompassing support system, including: - Aftermath Specialists: Post-divorce, continue to engage with counselors, accountants, and family advisors to navigate the new terrain of life after divorce.
- Lifestyle Enhancers: Enlisting the aid of personal trainers or dating coaches can rejuvenate both physical and social well-being as you start a new chapter.
- Sanctuary Creation: Craft a personal environment that is secure and nurturing, a haven within which to bolster one's reclamation of self.
The endeavor of rebuilding life after divorce calls for a vast array of helping hands and hearts, fostering an environment where one is not alone. By conscientiously assembling this network, the journey towards rediscovery and empowerment is no longer solitary. The collective wisdom and support encapsulated within it serve as pillars, ensuring that with time, individuals regain their independence and thrive anew.
Embracing Self-Care
In the throes of life after divorce, embracing self-care stands paramount, not merely as a luxury but as a foundational strategy for maneuvering through the upheaval. The act of self-preservation and nurturing allows for stress management, sharpens the ability to make informed decisions, and supports recovery. Transforming one's physical space can act as a metaphor for this new chapter; rearranging furniture and deep cleaning is more than a tidying effort—it's a tangible step towards new beginnings.
Enlisting a diversity of tactics fortifies the self-care regimen:
- Engage the Body: Incorporate a minimum of 30 minutes of exercise daily, underlining the connection between physical activity and mental clarity.
- Reignite Passions: Dedicate time to activities that spark joy, whether it be painting, hiking, or reading, providing a constructive diversion from stressors.
- Solidify Connections: Lean on the support of loved ones. Their presence offers a comforting touchstone amidst the flux of change.
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Professional Insights: Consult with mental health professionals adept at guiding one through the labyrinth of divorce-related challenges.
As life after divorce unfolds, the recalibration of daily routines becomes an opportunity to infuse one's life with peace and a sense of harmony. Such adjustments should be reflected in: - Establishing New Rituals: Embrace physical activities like yoga or meditation to recenter and bring tranquility to the spirit.
- Cultivating Community: End isolation by joining support groups or initiating get-togethers with friends, sowing seeds of companionship against loneliness.
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Nature Therapy: Find solace in natural surroundings, allowing the peace of the outdoors to facilitate a mental departure from taxing memories.
The complexity of emotions embroiled in how to get over a divorce necessitates indulgence in self-compassion: - List-Making: Compile a self-care list, detailing activities and practices that yield comfort and a sense of control.
- Expressive Healing: Confide in a trusted confidant—this sharing of burdens can foster catharsis and may uncover new perspectives leading to solutions.
- Allow Grieving: Recognize the significance of mourning the dissolution of the marriage, and respect the time required to heal before plunging back into usual routines.
Self-care in the wake of divorce is a multi-pronged approach that fosters resilience and facilitates the journey of finding yourself after divorce. Proactive stress management, nurturing oneself with proper nutrition, and side-stepping negative behaviors guard against emotional mire and promote clarity of mind. The call to rally support—be it from friends, family, or professionals—is a critical step in rebalancing the scales of one's life, ensuring that moving on from divorce is not a foray in the dark but a progression towards light and renewed purpose.
Navigating Co-Parenting (If Applicable)
A Parent's Guide: Explaining Divorce to my children available on Amazon
In the realm of life after divorce, the role of co-parenting emerges as a testament to both parents' commitment to their children’s well-being. Co-parenting is an undeniably active endeavor, requiring both parties to consistently and thoughtfully underscore their children’s needs. Such dedication is instrumental for providing stability and continuity, which are pillars of a nurturing environment post-divorce. Acknowledging this, co-parents acknowledge that the quality of their interaction can leave an indelible mark on the mental and emotional health of their children.
With the children’s best interests at heart, co-parents strive to create clear rules and guidelines that underpin effective collaboration:
- Parenting Plan Adherence: Meticulously follow the established parenting plan, and approach its modification with unanimous consent when changes in life circumstances occur.
- Conflict Resolution: Endeavor to resolve conflicts by setting boundaries firmly yet respectfully, and maintain decorum in communication to avoid adversely affecting the children.
- Communication Strategies:
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- Share essential child-related details promptly.
- Initiate discussions at appropriate times, free from emotional charge.
- Dispel assumptions, listen attentively, and respond thoughtfully, not impulsively.
Navigating transitions and visitation constitutes a considerable aspect of co-parenting post-divorce:
- Easing Transitions: Assist children in anticipating changes between homes, ensure packing is done in advance, and steadfastly adhere to the routine of always being the parent who drops off the child.
- Visitation Refinement: To make visitation seamless:
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- Implement a low-key and warm welcome upon the child's return.
- Double-up on essential items across homes to ease the physical burden of moving.
- Allow children their needed space to adjust after transitions.
- Establish special routines or rituals that children can look forward to in each home.
- At times, children might exhibit refusal to visit, which while potentially distressing, may only be ephemeral. Address this by uncovering the underlying reasons, staying pliable to the children's emotions, and maintaining open lines of communication with your former spouse.
For co-parents, the method of communication holds significance—it should be effective and amenable to both parties while setting reasonable expectations regarding response times. And while co-parenting exchanges can at times become mired in personal conflict, it’s crucial that these emotions remain separate from interactions about the children. Prioritizing the children's emotional safety involves shielding them from such conflicts, as prolonged exposure can have deleterious impacts on their physical and psychological health, social interactions, academic performance, and conflict resolution skills.
To navigate the emotional terrain of co-parenting effectively, crafting a comprehensive parenting plan is a powerful tool. It delineates the parameters for decision-making, routines, and communication, fostering an environment wherein respectful co-parenting can flourish. In instances where emotional hurdles impede the co-parenting landscape, therapy or counseling offers a pathway to surmount these challenges, equipping parents with strategies conducive to a cohesively functioning co-parenting relationship.
Seeking Professional Guidance
In the upheaval of life after divorce, seeking professional guidance can be a lighthouse in stormy seas, providing strategic insights at every phase of this profound transition. Such counseling can offer robust techniques to process and manage the intense emotions that accompany the dissolution of a marriage. It is a proactive step towards healing, especially vital when the intricacies of co-parenting demand mature, open communication and conflict resolution skills.
- Pre-Divorce Consultations:
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- Counselors assist in providing clarity on whether to pursue divorce, helping to explore all possible outcomes and consequences for all parties involved.
- They help both partners voice their perspectives and work towards possible reconciliation or a less contentious separation.
- Counseling During Divorce Proceedings:
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- Emotional support is given to manage the stress of legal proceedings.
- Strategies are provided to resolve ongoing disputes amicably and to communicate effectively, important for laying the groundwork of future interactions, particularly in co-parenting scenarios.
- Post-Divorce Transition:
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- The focus shifts to individual healing, establishing new routines, and moving on from residual negative emotions.
- Counselors can aid in redefining individual identity and navigating the landscape of single parenthood or re-entering the dating scene.
Available through traditional in-person sessions or flexible online platforms such as BetterHelp, professional divorce counseling is accessible regardless of one's geographical location or busy schedule, accommodating those in need of support without the constraints of travel. The prevalence of digital technology in therapeutic services ensures that help is just a few clicks away, providing a confidential and convenient modality for those recovering from divorce.
Divorce therapy can adopt various forms, addressing the unique facets of each individual's circumstances, inclusive of:
Collaborative Therapy:
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- Specifically tailored to co-parents to enhance cooperation and child-focused decision-making.
- Individual Therapy:
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- Helps to process grief, rebuild self-esteem and discover paths to personal growth post-divorce.
- Family Therapy:
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- This approach can facilitate the healing of family dynamics and strengthen the parent-child relationship.
Children, too, require understanding and support to navigate their parents' separation. Intentional conversations, collaborative activities like creating a personal history timeline, and drawing can be therapeutic, presenting opportunities for children to express their inner turmoil constructively.
In the pursuit of appropriate divorce therapy, it is prudent to consider the expertise in couples or marriage therapy, verify credentials, and evaluate one's financial and temporal capacities to sustain the therapeutic relationship. This strategic selection ensures the alignment of therapeutic expertise with the nuanced challenges presented by life after divorce, fostering an environment conducive to lasting recovery and a hopeful outlook on life's next chapters.
Moving Forward with Optimism
Maintaining an optimistic outlook in life after divorce is not just beneficial but essential for one's psychological resilience and overall well-being. It is a multifaceted process that oscillates between self-compassion and active engagement with life's myriad possibilities. The pursuit of self-improvement emerges as a beacon of progress; regular exercise fortifies the body and enhances mental health, while explorations within the social terrain of dating could signify readiness for new relational horizons. These ventures, pivotal in how to start over after divorce, kindle self-affirmation and carve pathways toward inner contentment.
In this transformative phase, recovering from divorce intertwines with adopting lifestyles that anchor positivity:
- Embrace Stability: Seeking equilibrium in daily routines provides a sense of control amidst post-divorce flux.
- Positive Influences: Surrounding oneself with uplifting individuals can imbue one's life with encouragement and hope.
- Healthy Living: Prioritizing physical health through nutrition and sleep is paramount in maintaining the energy needed for new beginnings.
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Get Organized: Clarity in one’s physical space reflects and promotes mental clarity, aiding in moving on from divorce.
As one journeys toward a rejuvenated mindset, it's imperative to acknowledge that while the road may be punctuated with challenges, the strength to surmount them lies innately within. Such recognition may manifest as:
- Gratitude Practice: Consistently acknowledging the positives can elevate mood and outlook.
- Creative Endeavors: Immersing oneself in artistic activities channels emotions constructively and nurtures the spirit.
- Emotional Efflux: Allowing emotions to ebb and flow naturally avoids the detriment of suppression.
- Incremental Changes: Making small, manageable amendments to one's lifestyle can collectively lead to significant transformation.
Conclusion
In conclusion, navigating the transformative journey of life after divorce is an arduous yet ultimately rewarding process that calls for resilience, self-reflection, and a commitment to personal growth. By summarizing our main discussions, we've seen the importance of managing emotional responses, setting realistic goals, rediscovering identity, and building a supportive network, all while emphasizing the centrality of self-care and professional guidance. These elements come together to form a comprehensive approach to not only recover from the pain of separation but to also chart a course toward a fulfilling and hopeful future.
The article has aimed to serve as a beacon, illuminating the pathways of healing, empowerment, and optimism that lie ahead. We have reinforced the thesis that life after divorce, despite its challenges, offers a unique opportunity for personal renaissance. As we conclude, let us reflect on the significance of these strategies and their potential to transform the raw complexity of divorce into stepping stones for a resilient and enriched life. Whether it involves further research, personal actions, or seeking professional aid, the steps outlined within this guide are designed to assist readers in embarking on their next chapter with confidence and a clear vision.
FAQs
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs) present themselves as a vital resource for individuals seeking clarity and support in their life after divorce. These questions delve deeper into an array of concerns, from the logistics of legal proceedings to the more personal aspects of emotional and financial recovery. They strive to provide answers that not only inform but also empower individuals in their journey of recovering from divorce.
- Finding Legal Support:
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- When seeking a compassionate family law firm, explore Modern Family Law, which serves Colorado, California, and Texas residents, or Mann & Kemp, catering to the Arkansas community. Select a firm that aligns with your needs and demonstrates a deep understanding of the emotional dimensions of this experience.
- Realizing Divorce Benefits:
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- Post-divorce life often brings a multitude of unexpected benefits. Many report enhancements in overall happiness, self-esteem, and love. Co-parenting skills can be strengthened, and the path to financial independence can become clearer as the individual navigates this profound metamorphosis.
- Navigating Emotional Turmoil:
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To manage the surge of emotions post-divorce, afford yourself a period for grief, maintain open channels of communication with your ex-spouse for co-parenting purposes if applicable, rekindle past interests, and lean on a network comprising friends, family, and potentially a therapist for support.
Managing finances post-separation involves meticulous planning and vigilant oversight. To stand on firmer financial ground in your life after divorce, consider the following:
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To manage the surge of emotions post-divorce, afford yourself a period for grief, maintain open channels of communication with your ex-spouse for co-parenting purposes if applicable, rekindle past interests, and lean on a network comprising friends, family, and potentially a therapist for support.
- Financial Management Post-Divorce:
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- Creating and adhering to a post-divorce budget is crucial.
- Regularly review your credit report to stay informed about your financial standing.
- Examine and adjust your savings plans to align with your current living situation.
- Conclude all joint accounts to ensure financial independence.
- Guard your financial information vigilantly to protect your interests.
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Build a trusted financial team, possibly including a financial planner, accountant, and legal aid, to guide you through this transition.
For those determined to forge a new existence in the wake of divorce, the approach is multifaceted. How to start a new life after divorce is a process marked with patience and persistence.
- Embarking on a Fresh Start:
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- Embrace self-care practices—these are the foundation stones for rejuvenation.
- Outline new, achievable goals to direct your progress.
- Construct a fresh routine that reflects your current values and aspirations.
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Approach the moving on from divorce process with persistence and patience, framing the divorce as an onset of fresh possibilities, not merely an end.
Self-discovery is integral to the process of adjustment in life after divorce. The journey is deeply personal and should be navigated without prescriptive timelines:
- Adjusting to Post-Divorce Existence:
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- In rediscovering your identity, dismiss the notion of set timelines for recovery.
- Compiling a solo bucket list can provide direction and excitement in your new chapter.
- Pursue passions with newfound freedom, and feel entitled to do so without a hint of remorse.
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Redesign your living space to align with your tastes, creating an environment that soothes and inspires you.
Discovering resources and advice tailored to your regional needs can make all the difference during this transformative experience:
- Divorce Resources and Legal Advice:
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- Residents of Pennsylvania seeking guidance on divorce, separation, alimony, and mediation can turn to MLFamilyLawCenter.com for information specific to the state.
- For legal advice and assistance in navigating the complexities of divorce in Pennsylvania, consider reaching out to the Main Line Family Law Center for support.
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Div-ide specializes in assisting with the intricacies of financial separation and settlements, aiding individuals in achieving equitable outcomes during divorce.
The emotional landscape of divorce can stretch far and wide. Those navigating this journey must prioritize their own reinvention and growth:
- Managing Trauma and Growth Post-Divorce:
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- Channel your focus on personal reinvention, taking lessons from the past to inform better choices moving forward.
- Exercise forgiveness, both towards yourself and others involved.
- Remove or alter objects that serve as unwanted reminders of the past.
- Embrace changes as fertile opportunities for learning, development, and generating a positive perspective in your new chapter of life after divorce.
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